Be yourself...

Can anybody be 100% true to himself/herself..i’m not even talking about others….

If somebody would hv asked me this a few years back…I would hv said an emphatic ‘yes’….we sure had discussed this in college…(good old college days)…and then went to canteen to eat/drink over it…golden days...carefree...less reponsibilities...not exactly less problems...but they were to that certain sphere...now when i remember those days....i smile...how foolish we were...or (were we innocent?)...u know what...i envy that 'stupid' me....anyway…where was i…yes the 100% question….as life goes on...can we still be 100% true....every time...any occasion?....and 100% is not 99.99%....its 24 carat pure gold 100%...

Is there an age for ‘being true to yourself...being honest? i guess so....growing up always come with putting one mask after other...

Life...my way...

I have a favourite pasttime....creating a hypothetical situations with the real people around me...& make stories out of them.....whenever i am getting bored waiting for someone or waiting for the train...or when i am driving alone or when have a lot of time on my hand or when things aren't going my way or when i am just plain frustrated.....i create a situation around me and decide the people who will act in it..and then just the

let the situation flow as i want it....the charaters are not necessarily the real ones though...sometimes i create a person out of nowhere...he/she does exist only in my stories....its fun i tell you....'cos the you are the one who control these stories in the end...so next time when u are telling me something earnestly...who knows..i may be in the different world altogether.....and you wont notice it a bit....i have mastered this art quite well.....

Glad to be born....

I loved my birthdays…who doesn’t…when u r a kid…I remember I used to wait for it right from the new year…i have a very convenient birthday…one that came along the way…in the middle of the year….so it felt as if entire year wasn’t spent just waiting…I mean I feel for those December people….their birthday…is the never one that just gone by….its always a birthday that’s at the end of the year...the next year...…by the time…u enter december….people r already looking ahead….

So the days before the actual day I used to start counting….a new dress (which my mother used to stitch most of the times)… a new book by default, and some sweets…selecting which chocolates to buy and take to school, and also deciding upon which friend will accompany u to other classes….which fortunate friend…I used to be hyperactive the previous night….

Then waking up…even slower than usual….listening to the voices outside…is anyone there….talking about my birthday….is anyone waiting outside to wish me…then they used to come in bunches…wishes I mean….aai, baba, sis and then the phone calls…most of them…grandparents….relatives…yes…that was the age when the friends didn’t belong to your home….they were ‘external’ entities….

Getting to school with the box of chocolates…attention from everybody…(I cant believe I enjoyed that attention then…)….then in the evening a small party at home….no cake cutting or blowing candles..…just a few close relatives and some neighbouring children..…some gifts…not expensive…but still precious…a nice dinner….with my favourite sweets…and …birthday is gone….

Then back to bed…still restless…but satisfied…a day older than yesterday…aren’t u?

As I grew older…some things changed….now the birthday dress bought from the shop (mom cannot possibly understand the latest fashions…that’s what my sis used to said…it used be her call which dress to buy on my birthday…I never cared for the dress…)….now some more phone calls…most of them friends…and some cool birthday cards….fewer gifts…but now the wrapper wasn’t the important factor….both the cards and the wrappers neatly kept away in a drawer….again a party at home…friends hanging out together….a dinner…cooked by my mother…

Birthday over…back to sleep…but not before carefully writing how the day went by in the diary…my best companion in those days….and back to sleep

Some years later….college days…birthdays started at midnight….surprise phone calls… still no cell phone…so I used to wait by the phone…hoping it would ring…it did ring for a lot many years…next day….some more phone calls, a treat in the college given by me…at a cheap food joint….nothing else changed….the evening treats at home…continued…the near and dear ones never let me down….

Now when I think of it…no 12a.m. calls, surprise or otherwise…waking up with cell phone ringing…99% of the times…parents calling…then everybody wishing at home…getting through the morning chores with phone breaks in between…and at the first chance…switch on the laptop….checking inbox…full of mails…e-cards…read and reply copy paste ‘thank you’ to most of them…then some more phone calls….calls from people you speak only twice a day…on your birthday and on his/her birthday….some more texts…most of them…just a casual ‘happy birthday’…taken from a set format…then to work….suddenly missing your earlier years….accompanying that retrospective mood…..time to indulge in philosophy…am I that old now? What I have done with my life…you know …that resolution thing…that makes your life miserable at the start of the new year…the same comes back to haunt you on your special day…but evening comes as a respite…a small party or eating out…making you forget those thoughts….

But one thing never changed…a birthday is still special….it is a day when you get surprises…or more appropriately u hope that u will get surprises…you hope people remember you on that day…and will try to reach you in some way or the other…social networking sites had made it easy…but it has taken away the charm…it has taken away the satisfaction that so-n-so remembers your birthday….i don’t even buy new cloths on birthday…a book…yes…I still add one book every year to my collection….i gift a book to myself on each of my birthdays….

A birthday goes even faster than it arrives….but it is still special…the fact that you r born on that day will always make it special…’cos at the end of the day…u r happy that u r born….

A kodak moment missed...

i saw a very peculiar view 2 days back...i dropped my daughter at her ground and was coming back home...and then i saw a man....he was sitting on the top of his car with his 4/5 year old son... and his wife was driving the car....and they were driving through various lanes behind the MIT college...just like that...and were clearly enjoying themselves... my guess is...it was all done for the enjoyment of their son...who was  in clearly high spirits after getting his way....but more than that the man amused me...he wasnt paying attention to anybody around...though there were a loy of people on the road continuously staring at them... and he seem oblivious to his surroundings......focussed on his job....to grant his son a wish :)

they say..you require more courage to do things that you really want to do...than to do things that you dont want to do...how true....

i was a bit late to take a picture...and by the time i realised it they were gone.... may be i will see them again...and will definitely take a picture then....but i guess most of the times...a opportunity missed..is an opportunity missed :(.....i wasted a chance of a kodak moment for sure

You just never know....

A person, in general is always unpredictable…u can say…’I know so-&-so…so well…I know him inside out…he/she just cant hide anything from me…even if he/she chose to remain silent….’but I believe its very dangerous after all to stick labels to a person….99% of the times u r sure to fall flat on the face…if not sooner then later for sure……then all you can do…is to wonder…and think…did I really know this person all these years?.....

i have come to believe that a person you meet everyday is a bit different from the person you met yesterday….just like every new and fresh day…though it starts with the same sun rising from the east….and ends with that sun setting at the opposite end…

reason being there’s a huge gap of 24 hours between who you have met yesterday…and who you r meeting today…..in between he may have gone through different experiences…different emotions…..and it may have changed him/her a bit …..even if the change is not visible immediately….and if you don’t realise it in nick of time…if u don’t catch it there….suddenly u find him/her behaving in an exactly opposite manner from that of your perception of him/her….

and u r astonished…..wondering….i used to know this person so well…what the hell has happened?....va pu mhantat te kharach...manus bighadala, kamatun gela mhanaje to vegala vagato ase nahi..fakt to aplayala have tase wagat nahi evadhech :)

U, A and U/A....

All these years....and all these days...a silver screen obsessed person like me...didnt know this thing...i was checking out upcoming movies in the city pride today...just then i found a board with censor certificates of the three movies that were running in the theatre....was curious to see what they actually write in the certificates...in the theatre the censor certificate vanishes within a second...and we arent really in the mood to watch those certificates...are we?...

So...i checked it out...till then i was under impression that..the movies r categorised into two types...U & A
U means open to all...the word they use in the certificate is 'Unrestricted Public Exhibition...hence the letter U...
A means above 18 years of age...again the word used is 'Adults only'..and hence A
 

to my astonishment...there was this third category...U/A....i mean i remember watching U/A for a lot of films...but conveniently considered it as U films...but U/A actually means 'under adult supervision'...so not exactly a movie which is open to all....but at the same time...it is not the 'adult only' movie...The actual wording they use in the certificate....is....
 

'fit for public exhibition with an endorsement of caution that the question as to whether any child below the age of 12 years may be allowed to see the film should be considered by the parents or guardian of the child'...'

so it is neither U nor A...its somewhere in between... 

Writer....

How will you define a good writer?  Someone who conceals his own identity when he writes…no then he should be called the actor…who has the ability to go over his own self and adopt a different personality from his own most of the times...that requires talent….to hide behind the mask..or is it?....but of course you will get to act like one’s true self once in a while…just how many times have you heard the actors speaking of a role…’so-and-so is just like me…that’s why I enjoyed doing this role’….why?? are they not bored acting like the one’s own self in their real life? Why this obsession to play a part in reel life too…perhaps they mean they enjoy playing one’s own self in the movies which they try hard to conceal in real life…and that’s why they enjoy it…they get to play it….but nobody connects it to their own life…but that’s not the point here…I am talking abt writers..i believe a writer should always express himself in his writing….the values he believes in…the person he really is…he should never in his life try to be an actor…guess..that would spoil the whole purpose of being a writer…